I'm reading personals at http://providence.craigslist.org and getting more and more disgusted with each one I read. I have not placed one since I've become single again and don't plan on it, lest I sound like one of these freaking tools. Here are a few for your reading displeasure. My comments are in normal text. Their drivel is in italics. I've cut this for those who are easily traumatized.
Here's a case of a guy who overinflates his self importance... Hope he isn't doing the same with his tires.
So, here's the deal, at least with me...sex comes later, much later...I'd really like to get to know someone a little first, before she tries to jump into my pants, and then play those stupid sexual games! Sex is not a weapon, and if that's the way you play the game, I'll just leave and then you'll have nothing!
Oh yes, because my life without you will be so empty. What ever will I do? Because it's inconceivable that a woman could ever have anything without a man. PUKE! First of all, you are already classifying all women as uncomprehensible sprites with a pussy. FUCK OFF. Second of all, you don't get all the control in a relationship "the deal" is laid out and negotiated by BOTH PARTIES, YOU FUCKING EGOTISTICAL CONTROL FREAK! OK, I'm calm now.
This is the title of a personal ad:
YOU COULD BE THE ONE!
Really? Yippy! Gee golly it's never occured to me that I could be your "one." That should have been my mission in life all along. First of all, no need to shout. Second of all, stop being so freaking selfish. You don't even know the person yet! You are putting on the static cling to anyone that even browses the ads! STOP! Your desperation is showing.
After a pretty reasonable ad:
i doubt anyone will find this terribly interesting, but what the hell.
Why didn't you just put this at the beginning so I wouldn't waste my time? I'm not into the whole not self confident tortured thing. Not many women are. If you whine in your personal ad about how uninteresting you are, do you really think ANYONE is going to want to meet you? NO!
This one, I think, is self explanatory:
Looking for a smart, pretty, funny girl with good fuckin' manners - 28
Lest anyone say I'm male bashing, I'll post some female snippets for your viewing displeasure later. :-P